Thursday, August 15, 2013

Reality Check

The realtors just left- and it seems that I am staying put, right
where I am, in my lovely little quirky old house on Council
Street. There- I said it. I AM NOT SELLING MY HOUSE, because
financially it would simply not be feasible. The reality is that
I would actually lose money, money I can ill afford to let slip
through my fingers. And that would totally defeat the proposed
purpose of my tentative plan.

You know, life has a way of continually surprising me. I
thought I had made the "right" decision when I opted to
downsize, to sell my house, and look for an apartment. But the
two kind real estate agents who toured my home with me
today, loving what they were seeing, oh-ing and ah-ing over
the many little features which make this place unique, were in
so many ways the answer to prayer. I have been so torn about
which way to actually go, which path to really take, how to 
live most responsibly. Making the right choice has occupied my
mind and heart for the past several weeks...and despite my
seeming positivity about my earlier "decision", I was really
having a hard time with the thought of actually leaving this
nest, this lovely home-place I have created over the past
twelve years.

So- here I am and here I will stay for the foreseeable future,
reaching out to my children for help now and then, to be sure,
with the yard-work and with inside maintenance which may be
beyond my abilities and stamina to do alone. And I find I
am breathing a huge sigh of relief...life, which has felt so
insecure and uncertain for a time, can now return to the pace
and rhythm of my every-day. And I give thanks to the Holy
One who fills my day, my heart, my life, for the many ways
in which my prayers are answered, my life made whole,
my days filled with delight and surprise. This IS my reality-
thanks be to God!

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