psalm of despair
words evade me this morning, and
depression envelopes me as surely
as the fog outside hides the sun
from my view.
loneliness creeps up on silent feet
and God seems far away.
an imposter- that is how i feel
a poser, acting as if my heart is
filled with God, yet stumbling along
this path alone...alone...alone...
how i envy those who seem so sure,
so certain of the ways and means
of God- for i am not.
wise answers evade me and
every ounce of energy is required
just to keep me on my feet.
i hurt for so many people, yet feel
shackled by my doubts and fears,
i want to hide my face, as you
have hidden yours, O God.
i want to stay within my safe,
comfortable space and
let the world go by.
so just for today, Spirit of Comfort,
comfort me...hold me safe beneath your wings.
wipe away my tears and
let me know that weeping is
the way in which my heart is
washed clean of all the pain
and doubt and fear.
comfort me, O God, and hold
the hand of this stumbling,
despairing child until my
strength returns and
i can stand again.